Archive for January, 2009

Jon Courson Devo

January 30, 2009 at 11:17 am · Filed under Faith, Growing Pains

January 30
 
  And when the centurion which stood over against him, saw that he so cried out, and gave up the ghost, he said, Truly this man was the Son of God.  
  Mark 15:39  
 
It was in the Lord’s death that the centurion found life.
It was in the time of darkness that he saw the light.

‘Lord,’ we cry, ‘if you loved Me enough to die for me, if the veil was rent to open the way for me, then why am I going through this difficulty, this tragedy?’

‘Because there are centurions watching,’ He declares. ‘And they will see My light in your dark days.’

Dear saint, if you want to be used by God, there is no other way than to go through disappointment, difficulty, and pain in order that people might relate to you, observe you, and see by the reality of Jesus in your life that He truly is the Son of God.

People are not convinced of His reality when they see us sailing through easy times and prosperous days. Such times cause only envy and cynicism. When people are truly touched is when they see us navigating adversity and difficulty all the while trusting the Lord (2 Corinthians 1:4).

This centurion was won, saved, converted not because he was one of the 5,000 eating bread and fish in the sunlight, but because he saw Jesus in the darkness.
 
This Daily Devotional is an excerpt from the book “A Days Journey” by Pastor Jon. “A Days Journey” is a collection of 365 short devotions from the New Testatment.  www.joncourson.com

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From the Father of Lights

January 29, 2009 at 2:21 pm · Filed under Blessings, Making Memories and Other Fun Stuff, Random

“If you then, being evil, know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will your Father who is in heaven give good things to those who ask Him!”  Matthew 7:11

Earlier today, shortly before, Lord willing, I move into my apartment my old job at the foster home was selling a lot of stuff. Check this out: I got a washer, dryer, file cabinet, end table, microwave, TV, and Yahtzee for $100!  Praise the Lord! I don’t know why He’s so good to me, but He is indeed.

“Every good gift and every perfect gift is from above, and comes down from the Father of lights, with whom there is no variation or shadow of turning”  James 1:17

“And my God shall supply all your need according to His riches in glory by Christ Jesus.”  Philippians 4:19

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Untitled

January 28, 2009 at 2:57 pm · Filed under Growing Pains, Ranting, Thinking Out Loud

“Ah!” and “uffda” are the only two words currently coming to mind. I even looked up some word in attempts to verbalize my insides, but to no avail. I remain feeling, well…unverbalizable…how’s that?  I don’t like this, not one bit. I think I may speak to a dear lady at my church who always seems to know all the things you’re feeling and thinking just by passing by you in the commons. It can be a bit freaky, but wonderful all at the same time. I’m not expecting this from her, but I do desperately want her anointed, powerful prayer to wash over me. 

That’s all.

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Movin’ on up…!

January 26, 2009 at 12:44 pm · Filed under Faith, Making Memories and Other Fun Stuff, Random, Uncategorized ·Tagged

I’m moving out (again). Yeah, baby!!! I’m so excited yet freaked out about the financially tightness this will bring. I’m both loving and hating the idea of living alone. Amber, come cook me dinner.

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Getting “Unstuck”

January 22, 2009 at 11:47 am · Filed under Faith, Growing Pains, Lessons Learned, Life, Thinking Out Loud, Uncategorized ·Tagged , , , ,

jen-and-ccmi-worshipimg_6048I”ve never had the dream where I’m trying to from run 
something, and it all seems as if it’s in slow motion like running
through thick mud.  I have, however,  felt that way over the
past year emotionally, spiritually, and mentally. 

Tuesday night may have indeed been an eye-opening
moment in my living dream of thick mud.  I attended the night
session of the Southeastern Calvary Chapel Pastor’s
 Conference at CCMI.

This may sound weird to those of you ”un-churched,” or perhaps especially to those of you who are churched.  Suffice it to say that this is not a bunch of pious men standing on stage behind a big pulpit looking down on all us sinner peons telling us how we should be living our lives differently.   This is a group of incredibly humble, honest, intelligent, and passionate men living out the Truth that the Word of God has taught them in life. These are men who have made mistakes, hurt others, and been hurt, betrayed, and the like.  You know, like the rest of us.  One thing that usually makes us different is that they get up again, and keep running the race, where as I have the tendency to stay where I was last defeated.  I praise God for these men, these servants, these teachers.

Story shorter: the combination of a second mini memorial-type service for Mary, the most genuine, for lack of better word, time of worship I’ve experienced in a long time – where at times my eyes would open to fall upon one of the most beautifully touching scenes on Earth: an entire church family lifting their hands lovingly, submissively, and humbly to the Lord, and having one of my closest friends on stage doing the same (my eyes are wet with tears even now) – the most down-to-earth, genuine, powerful message I’ve heard in years, and being surrounded by people I love so dearly it hurts, and knowing I am loved in return; the Spirit of God brought these things together in my heart, and I believe He “unstuck” me. Thank You, Father.  I still have a long way to go, and I’m certainly not running yet, but by God’s grace as I begin again to sow into my spirit I believe I will run again.

The though of leaving that place, and especially going to work the next morning having my day filled with none of that evening’s touch, was incredible disheartening.  Lord, teach me to commune with You in each moment, for no day set on You could ever be disheartening.

“I am glad about the coming of [the Pastor's Conference] for what was lacking on [my] your part they supplied. For they refreshed my spirit and yours. ” Corinthians 16:17-18

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Stuck

January 19, 2009 at 5:41 pm · Filed under Growing Pains, Life, Thinking Out Loud ·Tagged ,

How many times do we hear, especially if we’ve grown up in church, about hanging on to and pursuing your dreams, your passions, the things that burn in your heart to do?  We hear sermons on going after them, and walking by faith, not by sight.  All of these things are good…

…but what if your heart has dried up?  What if you haven’t an ounce left of the things that used to stir your heart, that kept you going?  Even as I listen to Mary’s final recorded lyrics, “In my heart is an empty place that needs You….only You have Words of life. You stir my heart with Your love…” they resound within my soul. I know I’m empty, and nothing without Him. I know I have Him, so why do I feel dryer, and more stuck than I ever have in my life? 

Jim King spoke at P. Malcolm’s 25th anniversary/church service last night, and his words hit home.  Ah, but see, even there…his words were SO true of my life (I’m reaping what I’ve sown over the last ten months, which has not been predominately seeds of my spirit) and I’m telling you they “hit home,” but even when I knew what he was speaking was true of my life, I barely felt emotion, I barely felt my heart shift.  Forget that we’re not to go through life following our emotions, but for heaven’s sake there ought to be SOME.  It’s like I sat there listening to him, and in my head I thought “thank you, Lord, that is so true…”  and that’s it. Nothing. My mind knows it’s true, but somehow the vital distance between my head and heart seems to have infinitely grown, and I’m not sure what to do about it. 

When I was in school I was constantly working toward something, and there was graduation to look forward to, and life after college.  When I was burning for ministry, mission trips, and the total dependence on God to bring all of that to fruition I had purpose. When I thought I could finally have my own place again I find out I can’t afford it. I can’t even move out.  If ever I have felt “stuck”- baffled by a problem or unable to find an answer to a question; at a standstill, bereft of ideas, up against a brick wall, at your wits’ end, it would be now.  If I go down into the depths of me I cannot find any reality of a dream or a vision or a purpose to go after right now.  Not even a string of the rope  I knew to be the call of God on my life that I somehow let unravel over the past several months.  

” Do not be deceived, God is not mocked; for whatever a man sows, that he will also reap. For he who sows to his flesh will of the flesh reap corruption, but he who sows to the Spirit will of the Spirit reap everlasting life.”  Galatians 6:7-8

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A Second Visit to Mary’s Tent

January 14, 2009 at 4:09 pm · Filed under Blessings, Faith, Uncategorized ·Tagged , ,

temporary tombstone

temporary tombstone

It’s really a blessing to work in the location that I do (at least  for now…that’s another story) because I get to drive by Mary’s camp site on a regular basis, and when I have time, I stop by to say hello.  I went by the other day for a little while on my way back to the office. I figure that with all the smoke break accumulated time I miss out on since I don’t smoke, I get to visit Mary.   Although the sod over her site is now there, I was surprised that nearly two months later (has it been that long since I saw her beautiful face?) the tombstone was not there.  I know nothing about these things, but really, what the heck….are we buidling a statue?  Yeah right, Mary would roll over and knock it down.img_6002

 

 

Anyway,I grabbed my bible, and just sat to read and pray for a while. I prayed for Joe; I prayed for Don, and his family as I looked up at his wife’s grave; I asked the Lord to forgive my selfishness, and my neglect of Him, and I thanked God for being SO incredibly good to Mary.  Is the CD finished yet?  I absolutely cannot wait. 

Some may think it odd, morbid, whatever, but I think it to be beautiful, so I snapped a few pics. It was a glorious day.
“It’s a jolly holiday with Mary….Mary makes the sun shine bright.”

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