Archive for May, 2008

Why, God?

May 28, 2008 at 12:32 pm · Filed under Faith, Growing Pains, Lessons Learned, Life ·Tagged , , ,

Ever ask that question?  Sure, we all have.  Those that don’t believe He exists have uttered those words.  When a child is kidnapped, or diagnosed with leukemia; when a husband or wife walks out; when kids turn from God, or end up in prison; when expectant mothers miscarry; when a husband and father loses his job; when you don’t get what you so thought you needed, etc.  Our default nature asks, “Why, God?”

I’m not trying to be stuck on this entitlement attitude we humans can get, but it’s something I’ve been made very aware of over the last few months, and how much it has hurt me, and others in thinking that way.  When we ask ”Why?” aren’t there implications of a selfish heart there as well?  ”Why did it happen to me?” “Why did it have to happen now?‘  Or even, “Why did it have to happen to her/him?” ”What did I (she, he, they) do to deserve this?”

When you hear of such circumstances as written above, have you ever stopped to ask God “Why not me?” What did I do to deserve not dying in that car accident, or not being diagnosed with cancer? 

See, the thing is, we do nothing to deserve to get, or not get something.  There can be times I believe when certain circumstances are the result of sin, or natural causes. You can’t expect to be an alcoholic and have a good liver.  You can’t treat your children like mean animals, and expect them to respect you.  The Bible is clear about each man being punished for his own sins.  However, sometimes, okay maybe often times we will not understand the “Why” behind things.  There is no black and white to it.

Look at Job.  He was righteous and God-fearing.  He lost everything.  Why?  In John Jesus is asked of the blind man if it was his sin, or his parent’s sin that caused the blindness.  Jesus said this.

That’s just it isn’t it? 

I was driving to see a client this morning, just praying and sort of conversing with myself, and the Lord, and for some reason “why” came up.  In an instant, in that still, small voice I heard the answer.  “It’s all for My glory.”  That’s it.  It seems too simple, but that’s it.  EVERYTHING happens, by purpose or permission FOR HIS GLORY.  Period.  His glory does not concern our comfort, or our happiness.  His glory does not ask our opinion.  His glory is not decided by our works, good or bad.  His glory is determined by His purpose.  If this sounds a bit discouraging…

Here’s the cool part for we selfish humans.  His plan for us is GOOD (Jer 29:11).  His thoughts towards us are GOOD (Psalm 139:17-18).  HE CAUSES EVERYTHING to work together for GOOD for those of us who love Him (Romans 8:28). God DELIGHTS in us and sings over us (Zeph 3:17). He leads us beside STILL waters (Psalm 23).

So, next time you find yourself asking, “Why, God?” Remember the answer: It’s all for His glory, and His glory includes our good.  That, my brothers and sisters, instead of “wee, wee, wee…”(you know, like the pigs), should leave us singing “Hallelujah” all the way home. 

P.S. This post gives those reading it the responsibility and permission of telling me to read and heed my own words if so needed in the future.

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He’s Been Too Good

May 21, 2008 at 10:21 am · Filed under Lessons Learned ·Tagged , ,

Ever wonder why things happen?  Why they happen to you?  Or why things don’t happen to you?  Does it ever seem like God is holding out on you, like everyone else gets what you’ve prayed for while life passes you by (a husband, a job, a house, friends, ministry, school, etc.)?  Do you ever get cynical and sarcastic with God?  “Thanks God. Thanks for giving all my friends the husbands they’ve prayed for.  Thanks for the 100 weddings I’ve been in without being the bride/groom.  My car broke, I’m broke, I’m lonely and alone, I have no hope of moving on anytime soon, I have loans to pay off, no health insurance, and now what?  That’s right.  I get sick.  Thanks for taking care of me, God.”  I’m reminded of “Bruce Almighty” when he felt that God was doing everything for everyone else, but overlooking him.  “I’m an ant, and God is a mean kid with a magnifying glass.”  “God has taken my bird and my bush.”  David often felt the same things, but perhaps without the disrespect we so often show God.  In Psalm 22 he writes:

 1 My God, My God, why have You forsaken Me?
         Why are You so far from helping Me,
         And from the words of My groaning?
 2 O My God, I cry in the daytime, but You do not hear;
         And in the night season, and am not silent.
         
 3 But You are holy,
         Enthroned in the praises of Israel.
 4 Our fathers trusted in You;
         They trusted, and You delivered them.
 5 They cried to You, and were delivered;
         They trusted in You, and were not ashamed.
         
 6 But I am a worm, and no man;
         A reproach of men, and despised by the people.
 7 All those who see Me ridicule Me;
         They shoot out the lip, they shake the head, saying,
 8 “He trusted in the LORD, let Him rescue Him;
         Let Him deliver Him, since He delights in Him!”
         
 9 But You are He who took Me out of the womb;
         You made Me trust while on My mother’s breasts.
 10 I was cast upon You from birth.
         From My mother’s womb
         You have been My God.
 11 Be not far from Me,
         For trouble is near;
         For there is none to help.
         
 12 Many bulls have surrounded Me;
         Strong bulls of Bashan have encircled Me.
 13 They gape at Me with their mouths,
         Like a raging and roaring lion.
         
 14 I am poured out like water,
         And all My bones are out of joint;
         My heart is like wax;
         It has melted within Me.
 15 My strength is dried up like a potsherd,
         And My tongue clings to My jaws;
         You have brought Me to the dust of death.
         
 16 For dogs have surrounded Me;
         The congregation of the wicked has enclosed Me.
         They pierced My hands and My feet;
 17 I can count all My bones.
         They look and stare at Me.
 18 They divide My garments among them,
         And for My clothing they cast lots.
         
 19 But You, O LORD, do not be far from Me;
         O My Strength, hasten to help Me!
 20 Deliver Me from the sword,
         My precious life from the power of the dog.
 21 Save Me from the lion’s mouth
         And from the horns of the wild oxen!
         
         You have answered Me.
         
 22 I will declare Your name to My brethren;
         In the midst of the assembly I will praise You.
 23 You who fear the LORD, praise Him!
         All you descendants of Jacob, glorify Him,
         And fear Him, all you offspring of Israel!
 24 For He has not despised nor abhorred the affliction of the afflicted;
         Nor has He hidden His face from Him;
         But when He cried to Him, He heard.
         
 25 My praise shall be of You in the great assembly;
         I will pay My vows before those who fear Him.
 26 The poor shall eat and be satisfied;
         Those who seek Him will praise the LORD.
         Let your heart live forever!
         
 27 All the ends of the world
         Shall remember and turn to the LORD,
         And all the families of the nations
         Shall worship before You

 28 For the kingdom is the LORD’s,
         And He rules over the nations.
         
 29 All the prosperous of the earth
         Shall eat and worship;
         All those who go down to the dust
         Shall bow before Him,
         Even he who cannot keep himself alive.
         
 30 A posterity shall serve Him.
         It will be recounted of the Lord to the next generation,
 31 They will come and declare His righteousness to a people who will be born,
         That He has done this.

This passage is rich! From prophecy about Jesus, to one of David’s many near death experiences where his enemies are closing in, his honesty before God, his desperation, his pain, his hope, most importantly his complete trust in God that leads him to worship. David was an adulteress and a murderer.  God called David a man after His own heart.  Contradictory? Confusing?  Hard to accept that a holy God would call such a man His friend?  Why?  Look at his heart.

I want to pause momentarily to say this: The above is not meant to invalidate any type of suffering, or trial, temptation, or test.  Whether God purposes certain things in our lives, or He allows them, I know from experience that they can often be some of the deepest, and darkest times in the pit of life.  There are times for genuine anguish, like David in the above Psalm, but then there are times where feel “entitled” to certain things that are just selfish – even happiness. Notice that David, even in his very valid time of distress, in his honesty before God he says numerous times throughou the Psalms phrases like, “But then I remembered…,” or, “But You, O Lord…,” or, ” Yet I will praise the Lord…,” or “You answered me.”  There is never a problem too great that praise should not be given to the Lord in the midst of it.

Excerpt from a Jon Courson devotional I found quite fitting for this blog.

Searchlight – Jon Courson
May 21
 
  Now therefore arise, go forth, and speak comfortably unto thy servants: for I swear by the LORD, if thou go not forth, there will not tarry one with thee this night: and that will be worse unto thee than all the evil that befell thee from thy youth until now.  
  2 Samuel 19:7  
 
“Snap out of it,” Joab said to David as David continued to mourn for his son, Absalom. “Don’t you understand that your people placed their lives on the line for you – yet all they see is that you’re moaning and groaning. If you don’t wipe the tears from your eyes and wash your face, they will desert you by nightfall.”Our outlook affects others. Therefore, if you are a servant of Jesus Christ, if you are committed to the King, you must not allow yourself the pampered privilege of being discouraged.When Aaron’s sons Nadab and Abihu were killed, the Lord said to him, “Others may mourn, but you cannot, for you are anointed. You have a job to do” (Leviticus 10:6-7). And Aaron continued on in ministry.If the anointing is on your life, you don’t have the “right” to pout and whimper. Discouragement, depression, and defeat are instruments the enemy will seek to use to affect your family, friends, and community. It is the mature saint who says, “It’s time for me to grow up and to cast my care not upon those around me, but upon the Lord solely” (see 1 Peter 5:7).“I have learned in whatever state I am to be content,” Paul said (Philippians 4:11). Contentment is the result of a decision you make with your mind rather than a feeling you have in your heart. God intervened on David’s behalf. The rebels were defeated. The kingdom was spared. Yet all David could see was that his son was dead.
 
This Daily Devotional is an excerpt from the book “Footsteps of the Flock” by Pastor Jon. “Footsteps of the Flock” is a collection of 365 short devotions from the Old Testament books of Joshua through Malachi.

This blog is unfinished, and it’s already quite long, and well, I started it in March, so i’m just going to post it. I  hope that we, like David, will ask the Lord to point out anything in us that offends Him (Psalm 139), and be open to allowing the Lord to shine His bright light into the dark places of our hearts; those places that we deny are there; those places that we refuse to acknowledge; those places where we feel “entitled” to somethine more, something better, where we blame God for what we think is lacking in our lives instead of trusting that He has already, and will continue to provide ALL our needs according to His riches in glory, and thank Him for it (Phil 4:19).  Besides evrything else, God is SOVEREIGN – He can do what He wants, according to His PERFECT plan, and He owes us nothing, not an explaination, not our happiness etc. In fact, He demands our obedience. Why? Because He knows what’s best for us more than we do!

Bottom line: He’s been too good to us for us to complain, or withhold from Him the praise due Him.

“Through the Lord’s mercies we are not consumed, because His compassions fail not. They are new every morning; Great is Your faithfulness.  ‘The Lord is my portion,’ says my soul, therefore I hope in Him.” Lamentations 3:22-24

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I Like Vacations

May 18, 2008 at 8:45 pm · Filed under Making Memories and Other Fun Stuff

I like vacations.  I think I’ve only ever had one or two that I would actually call “vacation.”  Visiting family for the holidays is fantastic, but it’s not a vacation.  School trips are great, but they aren’t vacations.  Mission trips are unmatchable, but they aren’t vacations.  My trip this past week to Myrtle Beach was a nice vacation.  Even with a cute, southern-as-can-be four-year old, and the most adorable five- month old on the planet, it was a great vacation.

My BFF, not like you say in high school then five months later you don’t even remember who you shared a BFF necklace with (okay, so never actually had a BFF piece of jewelry, but whatever), but my honest-to-goodness B-F-stinkin-F, Amber.  I tend to use “stinkin’” when I’m serious about something.  Spending time with her, listening to her sing, laughing together, eating together, going to see Hanson together, that’s right Hanson – don’t even get me started – it was all just wonderful.  Besides going to NewSpring, I mostly enjoyed simply walking around downtown Greenville with her.  South Carolina really is full of “Smiling Faces, Beautiful Places,” as their license plate so accurately states.  I like Amber’s smiling face the best.

I didn’t like the tears as I departed through the security gate only 30 minutes ago. 

“May the Lord watch over you and me until we are together again.”

Although my heart misses her already, it eases the pain knowing there will be a wonderful man waiting for me at baggage claim.  What the Lord has in store for us in the future I don’t know, but I know this: It is good, it is right, and it is splendid!

Incidentally, I should be boarding soon, yet there is no sign of any Allegiant Air employee at the gate…

So, I suppose you want to know what our vacation consisted of.  I flew into GSP last Saturday, Amber picked me up… *announcement from Allegiant that our plane is still 15 minutes out, so we’ll be running about 35 minutes late*… and we met her good friend Jen for dinner at Mimi’s Café.  Fried pickles…holy moly.  Jen blesses me because she blessed Amber.

Sunday Amber and I went to church – SO GOOD!  Then her cousin Kaycie, her kids, and friend Courtney came to pick us up. We loaded up the cars, and took off for Myrtle Beach!  It’s weird to me, driving five hours to get to the beach, but what a pretty drive.  Everything here is so lush, and bright green, and hilly.  *sigh*  Kind of reminds me of the green in Germany. 

We checked into our hotel, and then went grocery shopping so we wouldn’t be eating out every meal.  The self-check-out line made quite a loud fuss over making sure you moved your “sweet onion to the conveyer belt.”  Good thing we didn’t buy anything questionable or every shopper in Food Lion would have known it.

That night we went to the beach – it was a bit cool for me, but it was nice. 

We slept in every morning, spent time at the pool slash water park, and beach, and hung out eating our sandwiches and watching the kids in the hotel room.  *sigh*… vacation.  We went out to eat Monday night at Jimmy Buffet’s Margaritaville.  It was truly an experience.  The people on stilts were yelling some sort of command for us to participate somehow in the spirit of Buffet…mostly you couldn’t understand him, and it scared the four year-old.  The baby, however, was fine.  Maybe it was the margarita?  Let me tell you, the four year-old was a little upset over the fake giant hurricane from which came a huge bottle of tequila pouring into the biggest blender you ever seen in your life.    

*flight 705 with service to Sanford is now boarding throught gate 26*  Gotto go…try to finish this later with pictures.  

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Have You Ever?

May 14, 2008 at 4:57 pm · Filed under Life

As I once again was brought to tears concerning a particular situation/person today the first line to a Brandy song came to mind.  I’ve never paid much attention to that song for two reasons: I was in high school, I think, when it came out, and I’ve never cared too much to really listen to Brandy, nor did I watch Moesha.  No particular reason, just didn’t.

Anyway, I just googled, and read for the first time the lyrics in their entirety.  To my surprise, I found myself saying, “Wow, that’s a really good song, and more appropriate than I thought.”  Clearly the context of the song is different as my circumstance has no romantic attachments, still, the meaning rings true. 

This is twice now that I have found myself hurting deeply over a friendship.  Twice in a matter of about five years.  Twice in my life, for I have only ever grown so close with a friend twice that heartache and loss of sleep have been the result of a distancing; a change; a change that I do not understand.

It has given me pause more than once recently to find myself suddenly realizing that God is giving me the smallest idea of how His perfectly loving heart must absolutely ache.  He does not love conditionally.  Yes, we’ve all heard that, we’ve all believed in to a degree (if we really believed it we would lead different lives than we do), but we must not only believe He loves, but that He hurts.  When Christ sweated BLOOD giving up his will (to not go to the cross – think of all that entails), to obey His Father’s Will, to suffer indescribable pain, physically and emotionally for it was the only time in history God turned His face from His son – that is love. 

I thank God that He has given me a miniscule, for that is all my brain can comprehend, glimpse of what it is like for Him each moment He looks at His Son’s nail-scarred hands, and simultaneously in His omniscience looks on as the very people those hands, and heart bled for turn from Him, consciously rejecting His unconditional love, or receiving it but not giving it back.  Oh, Father, how your heart must ache.  In the moments I have loved You the most, I have not loved You at all.

I have prayed since I heard those beautiful, impossible words Brooke Fraser sings in “Hosanna,” “…show me how to love like You have loved me.”  Please do not misconstrue this into thinking that I am boasting in any way, or that I love like He loves.  God forbid I have such thoughts.  It is moments like these where I realize I am anything but loving as He loves.  It causes me to check my heart against 1 Corinthians 13 – how are you doing?  How am I doing? 

I leave you with the lyrics to the afore mentioned song.  Read 1 Cor 13, then read these lyrics.  Have you ever?

Have you ever loved somebody so much
It makes you cry
Have you ever needed something so bad
You can’t sleep at night
Have you ever tried the words
But they don’t come out right
Have you ever, have you ever

Have you ever been in love
Been in love so bad
You’d do anything to make them understand
Have you ever had someone steal your heart away
You’d give anything to make them feel the same
Have you ever searched for words to get you in their heart
But you don’t know what to say
And you don’t know where to start

Have you ever loved somebody so much
It makes you cry
Have you ever needed something so bad
You can’t sleep at night
Have you ever tried to find the words
But they don’t come out right
Have you ever, have you ever

Have you ever found the one
You’ve dreamed of all your life
You’d do anything to look in their eyes
Have you finally found the one you’ve given your heart to
Only to find that one won’t give their heart to you
Have you ever closed your eyes and
Dreamed that they were there
And all you can do is wait for that day when they will care

What do I gotta do to get you in my arms baby
What do I gotta do to get in your heart
To make you understand how I need you next to me
Gotta get you in my world
‘Coz baby I can’t sleep

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